10 Signs That Your Relationship Is About To Hit A Rough Patch And What To Do About It

Signs that he's unhappy with your relationship
A couple going through relationship crack [Image source: Counseling Today]

Hi Zola,


Iโ€™ve been in a relationship with this guy for close two years now. At first, our relationship was full of love and excitement. He was the guy of my dreams, and I had introduced him to all my friends. In the beginning, he always showed me so much love and affection. Every weekend, he takes me out and pampers me with gifts. I even started building castles in my head; how we would have the cutest children and have a happy, successful marriage someday. But recently, heโ€™s changed. I feel like heโ€™s slowly pulling away. He doesnโ€™t call or text daily like he used to. Iโ€™m scared that Iโ€™ll lose him, I love him, and Iโ€™m starting to feel like Iโ€™m the only one feeling this. I donโ€™t want to be hurt.

Zolaโ€™s Advice

A friend had sent me this message a month before she broke up with her boyfriend. It occurred to me that most people go through this phase in a relationship. In most cases, just before the relationship comes to an end, you feel like you are doing the most and your partner isnโ€™t enthusiastic about the relationship as you are. Most of the time, you are too engrossed in the relationship to notice the change. So, here are some of the signs you need to look out for if you feel like your partner isnโ€™t giving the same energy as you are.ย 

#1: You no longer do โ€œyourโ€ relationship activities together

Those little habits and rituals that have become your thingโ€”could be watching a specific television program, or listening to a particular song. If your partner is bailing on them repeatedly, it could mean that heโ€™s losing interest.ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย 

#2: They are bored not just by the relationship, but everything in general

Boredom is one of the telltale signs that a relationship is in trouble. If they feel bored, not just by you, the partner, but also by life in general, it could mean that the relationship is no longer making them happy.

#3: You always have to repeat yourself

Attention in relationship
Image from: Graphic Online

If your significant other makes you repeat yourself most of the time, you have all the right reasons to expect the worst. It shows that they are not paying attention to whatever you are saying and that their interests are dwindling.

#4: Something significant happens, and you are not the first person they tell

ย It could be a job promotion or a big win, and you are not the first person he tells means that he does not value you as much anymore. Human beings are social animals. Therefore, when a big event happens, it is almost impossible to resist the urge. The first person that comes to our mind at such a time is the person we love the most. If he is not telling you first, question your position in his heart.

#5: You have become extremely agreeable

This might seem to be a good thing, but that might not be the case. Being extremely agreeable could mean that your partner does not care anymore to put their foot down and argue; they are just done.

#6: They are suddenly spending most of their time with friends and family rather than building your relationshipย 

This is a giant red flag that your partner is almost checking out. Spending less time with you and dedicating it to family and friends means they are putting more energy into other relationships in their inner circle and pulling away from you.ย 

#7: You have that gut feeling

Your body can in most cases register that something is off even long before your brain acknowledges it. Itโ€™s better to listen to that voice. Most are the times when your gut feeling was never wrong, and you regret later that you should have listened to it. Some call it the sixth sense.

#8: You no longer make plans of a future together

When you are no longer optimistic or talking about your relationship or making plans for the two of you together, it is often a sign of a big crack. Like where youโ€™d live or whether or not you would like to have kids could mean that this person does not see a future with you anymore.

#9: Changes in the bedroom

Image from: Independent.co.uk

This is not always a sign of the end of the relationship. However, when it comes at the heels of other factors, it can mean that something isnโ€™t right. Major bedroom changes is something both partners has to agree uponโ€”except when one partner is trying to surprise the other.ย 

#10: When they do not kiss you like they mean it

Kissing usually is one way to show affection and physical attraction in a relationship. Still, when thereโ€™s no passion in that experience, not like it used to be, it could be a sign indicating that your relationship is coming to a halt.ย 

Final Thoughts

If most of the above are signs that youโ€™ve observed in your relationship, most probably your relationship could be coming to an end. Your partner could be falling out of love. Noticing these signs early could give you a chance to save your relationship before it comes to a halt. Love is a beautiful thing, and you deserve all the love in this world!

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