Ngozi I will give you an honest answer but I don’t think it is the one you are looking for.

I understand you were tired. I understand the night shift. I understand you told him the timing wasn’t good. All of that is true and your husband should have handled it better.

But I have to be straight with you. His mother drove from Maryland. His family came to your home. And you stayed in bed for two hours. In our culture that is not something I can dress up as okay no matter how I look at it.

And here is the thing that I keep coming back to. They brought food. You did not even have to cook. All that was needed from you was to come downstairs, greet your mother in law, tell her you had just come off a night shift and were not feeling your best, thank her for coming and excuse yourself. That is maybe 20 minutes. That is it. Instead she sat in your living room for two hours wondering where her son’s wife was.

I know people will come here and say your husband should have told them not to come. Maybe so. But I also know that telling your mother she cannot come to visit is not something every man finds easy to do. He was probably hoping you would pull through. Most women in that situation would have.

You came down eventually and that is something. But the damage was already done by then.

I think you know in your heart this could have been handled better. Your husband is not innocent but I understand exactly why he is embarrassed.